This past year felt like the most scandalous in sports history. DWIs, murders, suicides, divorces, affairs, OFFENSIVE TWEETS! It was like a real version of the WWE and we sort of feel like the whole industry took a chair to our heads. We’ve selected a dozen of the biggest headline-grabbers because it just sounds nice. 12 in ’12. It’s like a massage for your ears.

Before we dive into the list, we feel obligated to give you a heads up / note the buzzworthy news items that didn’t make the cut: Felix Baumgartner’s Jump (not a sport), Manny Pacuqaio losing on questionable score cards and getting knocked out by Marquez, or the brawl at that lingerie football game. We’re talking about items that consume a nation and the world.

1. The Olympics

Michael Phelps became the most decorated Olympian of all-time and retired only to sink the longest putt ever recorded on TV. Ryan Lochte was a media magnet with his ridiculous interview skills. He tried to trademark the catchphrase, “Jeah” and admitted to peeing in the pool among other mind-numbing quotes. McKayla Maroney was not impressed with winning silver then everything else. Athletes finally admitted that event is one big “sex fest”. Who could blame them with all the hot competitors?

2. Ronda Rousey

You want to hook up with the first ever female fighter to sign with the UFC? Track her down the night before her match. Of course, you’ll have to fend off her boyfriend but maybe you could swing something kinky. Just tell her that an extra man in the mix will double her powers in the octagon.

3. Chad Johnson

Ochocinco is no mo’. Chad changed his name back in what appeared to be a return to his roots, but instead of recapturing his Pro Bowl caliber play, he gets rung up on domestic battery charges, which lead to divorce less than 2 months of marriage. He went on to admit he cheated on his spouse and was accused of being a deadbeat dad for not paying child support. He should be able to make back his money selling life rights for his biopic. Everyone loves a comeback.

4. Sarah Jones

The former Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader and high school teacher had an affair with an underage student. She tried suing TheDirty.com for disparaging her, but screwed up the paperwork. Like any other trainwreck that can’t seem say or do anything right, she’s rewarded with a reality TV show. That kid she seduced hit the jackpot, huh.

5. Jeremy Lin

“Linsanity” seems so long ago, doesn’t it? With J-Lin on the Houston Rockets, the craze has faded significantly. But, what a whirlwind stretch it was in the early part of 2012 – from that first frenzied week to full-on global domination. ”Lin Dynasty” became the first NBA player to score at least 20 points and have seven assists in each of his first five starts. He scored the most points by any player since the ABA/NBA merger in ’76-’77 in his first three, four, and five career starts. The “most popular Knicks player in a decade” has struggled for the Rockets early on, but has shown flashes of his Linsane form.

6. Peyton Manning

An era came to an end when the Colts cut ties with Fivehead. The organization went in a different direction and so far it’s paid off for both parties. Broncos have the AFC West locked up and might even sneak in a first round bye in the playoffs. The Colts, behind rookie Andrew Luck, have far exceeded expectations and could end up facing Peyton in the postseason. I know I’m pulling for that matchup – just too bad it’ll most likely be in Denver.

7. Tim Tebow

With Peyton in Denver, that meant God’s QB was out of a job. He never really gained the confidence and trust of John Elway. So, the Jets, a team that appears to desire headlines and newspaper / magazine covers instead of championships, traded for the Miracle Maker. Gave up a bunch of picks and some cash only to watch him throw about a dozen passes and miss games with a broken rib (which women come from according to His Book). What a waste. Still, Gang Green has an outside shot at making the playoffs, and I have to figure that Tebow Time is nigh.

8. Lance Armstrong

Has anyone ever gone from The Man to Con Man like Lance? He dominated the Tour de France for nearly a decade, beat cancer, helped others beat cancer, had cameos in movies and on TV shows, starred in commercials, and was a walking example of will and fortitude. Now, he’s just a cheater. Dropped by his sponsors, lost endorsement deals, severed ties with the charity he helped build. Who knew a bicycle could cause so much commotion?

9. Bountygate

The news broke in early March and, with the help of former NFL Commish Paul Tagliabue, appears to finally have come to a conclusion – pending Vilma’s ‘suit against Goodell. Though many would say How far-reaching was this scandal? We have Pop Warner coaches paying off 8 year olds to take out opponents. The things we’ll do for money… or ‘Call of Duty: Black Ops II’.

10. Bobby Petrino

I’m not going to sit here on my high horse and tell you I’ve never been tempted. But, Bobby needed a brain scan before this all went down. Crazy to think a coach in charge of directing and organizing hundreds of men for months and years on end can make so many stupid decisions. Do the wives need to step up their game? Is this why pole dancing has become so popular?

11. Penn State Football

This whole travesty came to light in 2011, but it stretches back to the ’70s. A sad ending for JoePa’s legendary career, his passing, the creepy heebie-jeebies emanating from Sandusky, the cover-ups and reports, players leaving for other schools. It’ll end up as a movie someday. But then came Bill O’Brien and a surge of support. 8-4 record, 6-2 in the conference. Success that came after a dreary 0-2 start in demoralizing losses to Ohio and Virginia. That’s one way to overcome one of the biggest controversies in sports history.

12. Jovan Belcher / Junior Seau

I know. It looks like I cheated. But, these two situations are tied to a bigger issue in the NFL – concussions. Bob Costas would lead you to believe Belcher’s case (and I guess to a certain extent Seau) is more about gun control and we could argue ad nauseum about that but, despite the advancement in protective equipment, the litany of new rules and policies surrounding hits to the head, there still exists a murkiness to the effects of playing football after a player’s career is done. I love football, but no game is worth that kind of trauma.

Did we miss anything? Let us know if the comments!

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WRITTEN BY: Neal is the Editor of Dailymotion’s Sports, Comedy, and Viral Channels.